How to Respect a Woman in 2017
By Elizabeth Barrera
The more time goes by and the older we get, it seems to me that it keeps getting harder to understand how to respect a woman. As unfortunate and as ridiculous as that may sound, I think that’s basically where my generation is mentally. And even generations before that, it just happens to be much more evident in mine.
It looks like society keeps losing respect for women, but I think the need for respect begins with us, women. It’s about the way we portray and carry ourselves, the way we let people talk to us. The way we talk about ourselves, the way we let others treat us. It’s about the way we talk about things that are and aren’t important to us. I think those things are the things that are making us lack self-respect to begin with. However, I think that most importantly, it’s because of the way we let ourselves be treated.
Regardless, this isn’t a good enough excuse as to why people should treat us the way that they’re treating us. And by people, I mean men.
When we go into dating, it almost seems like the lack of respect for a woman is the biggest flaw. I’m not too sure I’m even understanding why this is happening aside from music saying it’s perfectly fine to get p*ssy, and our very own president saying it’s okay to grab a woman by it. With all freakiness aside, I don’t think this is the best idea to follow. We should always aim to respect women and support them instead of bringing them down. So for those of you who are trying to treat and respect a women better, let me give you a few tips for tackling this noble plan of yours:
Empathize with her. You aren’t a woman, so you have no idea what she goes through on a daily basis. It may begin with multiple men catcalling her on her way to work, managers patronizing her at work, constant belittlement, and objectification. It’s a daily routine, but she still powers through it. So if she made a mistake, responded in a harsh manner, overreacted to something you said, or even doubted you, don’t pick a fight. Listen to her, and even if you don’t understand, just try to.
Don’t judge her. She may have made a lot of mistakes in her past, and slept with people she wishes she hadn’t. But we all mess up in different forms. Whether she failed a semester worth of classes or fell into alcoholism and drugs, or depression, it shouldn’t matter to you who she slept with, how she failed, or what addictions she fell into. What matters is her growth. How she realized her mistakes and worked to fix them. What matters is who she is now and the woman she strives to be.
Be patient. Think about all the times she’s been patient for you. Whether she’s waiting on a text from you, or simply having trouble believing what you say. You are both a work in progress. She is not perfect and neither are you, so don’t expect to see perfection. She’s flawed, and though she may mess up, know that she’s trying, and she deserves for you to do the same.
Be compassionate. Her heart is bigger than you can imagine, and regardless of the vast amount of times you mess up, she’ll always prohibit her friends from speaking badly of you. Do the same. Be nurturing and be understanding. It’s not emasculating for you to be this way. It’s grown and mature, and it’ll speak volumes of your character.
Own up to your mistakes. There’s nothing worse than a man who lets his pride get in the way of something with great potential. You can’t let her take the blame all the time because of her mature decision of “being the bigger person”. If she’s constantly trying to fix things, then the least you can do is reciprocate and attempt to do the same. If you don’t understand her perspective, make an effort to empathize with her, as mentioned earlier. Even if you have partial fault, apologize for that. There’s no point in holding on to grudges. It’s painful and exhausting, and it doesn’t let you be happy. Swallow your pride and apologize for the minor mistake you made.
Forgive her. If she did something wrong to you or unintentionally hurt you, you must learn to forgive. Don’t just do it to give her the benefit of the doubt, but do it because you need inner peace. Show her that you’re not going to let a minimal argument destroy the foundation you’ve built together.
You must defend your woman when she’s being pushed down. You must motivate her when she feels like giving up. You must be there for her when she hits her lowest points. And you must be there to pick her up after being shoved to the ground. Respect her, show her love. Build the perfect foundation and build that respect, and you’ll both go a really long way.